I am pretty obsessed with my sibs (obv). I thank the Big Guy & my rents every day for the Naugler 5 and wouldn't trade having two brothers and two sisters for anything in the whole wide World.
But I've often had friends fantasize about having a big family or acquaintances ask whether I'd recommend they go for more when they've already got 3 kids or 4, so today I thought I'd post some of the wisdom I've shared with friends and random people alike on family size in general over the years.
First - without a doubt, 2 kids is THE most manageable amount of offspring to have. one per parent at any given time. plenty of resources, time, energy and love to go around. plus the little ones learn to share (sort of).
Second - if you have 3 kids, you're golden because you never have to upgrade from a sedan or small SUV to a car with a second back seat. there's ample room for backpacks and sports equipment w/out needing the extra space afforded to you in a godforsaken minivan. plus your kids get the practice of being friends with two distinctly different individuals which is clutch. true you get a middle child, who's bound to have a middle child complex, but you're at least contributing conceivably well adjusted individuals to the world.
Third - if you go for 4 kids, the good news is, between you and your partner you can hold all four of their hands when crossing the street. this i deem a verrrrry important aspect of the child rearing process. and maybe it's just me, but i think it's also an important symbol of attention division - if each kid gets one parents' hand it's fair to assume each kid is getting an equal amount of attention, love, and energy throughout their childhoods.
Fourth - 5 kids... 5 is the real deal, guys. THE REAL DEAL. 5 is a special force division, a basketball team, a LITERAL HANDFUL. There are 5 kids in The Family Stone, and Diane Keaton and Craig T. Nelson did a damn good job with that fictitious brood. I think mama and papa naugs really knocked it out of the park with the 5 Naugleberry knuckleheads in real life too, so it's not that it can't be done well, it's just that the decision to have 5 kids reeeally deserves SERIOUS contemplation and reflection ahead of time...
Fifth - same thing with 6 kids. Calls for a SRS (I think that's how the kids are shortening serious these days) amount of pre-meditation. Cause 6 must merit the lable of a gaggle right? a flock? a herd?
Really, more than four is no man's land and anyone's game. more than ten, obviously, forget about it... you run out of fingers to count them off on. that's a crazy undertaking - just simply not for the faint of heart.
But who am I kidding? Having ANY kids is not for the faint of heart.
-- I'll give a simple nod in this split second to the only children and babymomma / babydaddies of only children out there now because that's quite the undertaking in its own right - you are responsible for successfully socializing that little one who's flying solo. So g'luck with that.
Back to bringing any amount of babies into the world... it's got to be easily the craziest career choice out there and nearly EVERYONE's inclined to do it.
But if I have learned anything in this week of "caretaking" in Newton, it's that ANY number of dependents is significant. So you really just gotta know your limits, cast your lot and then play the game to the best of your ability.
It's kind of like that old Hasbro toy Kitty Surprise (a Christmas favorite in '93)
I had the "breed" of cat below back in the day.
...and she had a litter of 4 (exactly what I'd been wishing for as an 8 year old) so I named them Alexandra Marie, Marie Alexandra, and then two boys names in the same back to back just reversed ordered... Charles something? Something Charles was it? needless to say, I have come to realize I could never handle having 4 kids. I should have figured that out in fourth grade when I couldn't even come up with 4 distinctly different names for my kitten surprises.
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